Among Cypriot Women:
The local context
Maria Hadjipavlou, Ph.D
Recent studies on Cypriot women’s experiences, voices and desires across different Cypriot communities have demonstrated that women in all Cypriot communities find themselves in a transitional context where modernity and traditionalism are intermixed in both the private and public realms of their lives. This can explain the many kinds of contradiction, confusion and ambivalence that cut across women’s responses to various issues. As it came up in the interviews women’s awareness on gender issues and their sensitization to the prevalence of the male dominant culture in Cyprus
In Cyprus
Women’s education as our research (2003) has shown is still contingent upon their socially constructed roles as care takers. Women refer first to family, home, caring for the others. They place career last in their scale of priorities whereas men place career on the top of their priorities and family last. The perception that spending more years for advanced education would implicate a higher degree of committment to studies and subsequently neglect of family (EDI-Women in Public Life, 2006) is still prevalent in the Cypriot society. I often hear my female students express this same view internalized from their families and their social environment. Mothers often try to discourage their daughters from pursuing advanced studies since, in their view, they will not need it once they get married. Although statistical data suggest that today girls receive much more education than their mothers or grandmothers, an invisible ceiling is still in place, restricting young women’s expectations and prescribing how much education women should receive. Attitudes of the kind “you have had enough education, time now to get married” are grounded on the gendered understanding of the right to education and the socially prescribed roles for women. Studies in social history have enabled us to analyze and understand as historical phenomena women’s attitudes, beliefs, reproduction, family structures and love behaviour, things which were until recently viewed as little more than biological ‘givens’ (Sylvester, 1989). This has also allowed us to gradually replace the simplistic view that women are merely the victims of the patriarchal order of things and recognize instead the possibilities of women’s agency.
Alternative Ways of Knowing
The use of gender as an analytical tool in understanding women’s and men’s experiences in the world has opened up both a theoretical and practical debate amongst academics, activists and policy makers From the moment women entered academia they sought to examine and dispel beliefs suggesting sexual polarities in intelleigence and personality characteristics. Historically, it had been assumed that the development of women’s intellectual potential would inhibit the development of their emotional capacities and that the development of men’s emotional range would impair intellectuall functioning. (Belenky et. al., 1986) This assumption may sound ridicoulous to some of us who are privileged today, especially in the West, but elements of it still prevail nowadays not only in Cyprus but elswhere. For instance, in Germany as Mathiopoulou (1993) informed us there are still university professors who would discourage a female doctoral candidate to pursue doctoral studies because she would not have the time to use her academic qualifications after she gets married and has a family, which, due to her biological limitations, should be soon.
Human experience is gendered and this understanding is central to the radical implications of feminist theory which emerges from and responds to the lives of women. The recognition of the impact of gender and an insistence on the importance of the female experience have priovided the vital common ground for feminist research and thought. Listening to women’s voices, studying women’s writings, and learning from women’s experiences have been crucial to the feminist reconstruction of our understanding of the world. Women’s persoanl narratives are, among other things, stories of how women negotiate their “exceptional” gender status both in their daily lives and over the course of a lifetime.” (Personal Narrative Group, 1989 (p.4-5)
For women, according to Sandra Harding 1998, (p.103) to name and describe their experiences “in their own terms” is a crucial scientific and epistemological act. “Members of marginalized groups must struggle to name their own experiences for themselves in order to claim the subjectivity, the possibility of historical agency, that is given to dominant groups at birth (or at least as psychoanalytic theorists, report in infancy) (p.!03).”
Ways of working together
When we began our research project on “Women in the Cypriot Communities”, itself a pioneering study, and which is located within the broader global context of studying women’s issues and their experiences we viewed reality beyond binary conceptions, as complex. We used both “hard” and “soft” methods and gained positive insights from both. The data and general observations I refer to here is based on both quantitative and qualitative methods.
In a patriarchal society such as the Cypriot the two sexes are socialized into different roles and are associated with different values. It is expected of each sex to behave according to the socially constructed roles, gender stereotypes and expectations. In addition, the space in which each gender is expected to move and to be self-actualized is socially determined that is, the private space is associated with the female and the public with the male (Tickner, 1992). When one gender (and it is often women) moves from one space to the other or chooses to be in both, then a social “disturbance” is created and any resultant social problems are usually blamed on this “anomaly” We often hear comments such as the anti-social behaviour of children is due to the fact that women have left their household duties to work outside the home, or the increase in divorce and spousal infidelity is due to women’s economic independence and their wish to create careers for themselves!
Separating public from private space leads to a separation of mind and body, whereby women are associated with nature, something that is mortal and corrupt, whereas men are associated with civilization, which is immortal and significant. In such an environment, both genders lose (Janeway 1971, Ortner, 1994). Each is deprived of the full spectrum of choices and a holistic development in a community structured by a variety of connections, rather than by separation and opposition.
In a patriarchal society we also experience a hierarchy in the value system whereby the feminist values of connection, caring, creating a consciousness that is relational, contextual, integrative and life affirming, are considered as inferior or of less importance than those engendered by men’s activities such as competition, the exercise of power, rationality, hard headedness, ambition, and efficiency. Thus, as Bell Hooks (2000) would argue, simply changing the structures is not enough. We also have to change the prevalent value system.
The reserach project to which I make reference below took us 11-months to complete, while the idea for this project dates back ten years.. Timing and ripe socio-political conditions play a large role in researching aspects of women’s life in a divided society. The major aim of this project has been to bring to the surface the invisible and give voice to the voiceless. Issues of inclusion/exclusion have always been political in Cyprus
From the beginning I wanted all of us to feel equal participating partners thus copies of the project proposal were given to each partner and we jointly discussed the need, the aims, the objectives and other ideas. I expalined why I proposed to focus our study only on women.The project left my initial control as each of the NGOs became increasingly involved. Each acknowledged the other’s strenghts, talents, capacities and limitations. Thus leadership was excercised by each of the participating women. Each took responsibility of a part of the project and we all shared the whole. It was an empowering experience. We introduced the concept of “heterarchy”, meaning each one has power and that power is in abundance and not the exclusive right of the dominant group, i.e. the Greek Cypriots.
Why Only Women?
In our study we chose to listen only to women because as Belenky et al. (1986) tell us in their book “Women’s Ways of Knowing”, “the male experience has been so powerfully articulated that we believed we would hear the patterns in women’s voices more clearly if we held at bay the powerful templates men have etched in the litarature and in our minds” (p.9)
One of our practical aims was to develop a safe thinking space for women from all communities to articulate their opinions, their concerns, their values and voice in addition to realizing their intra-and inter-differences. Another aim was political, that is to raise awareness for the right of women to participate in a world shaped by both men and women. We believe that women need their own space to listen to each other and to affirm that knowledge is also produced through reflecting on our experiences, which become the most important data upon which to construct our realities The level of commitment increased as we built trust and the project moved ahead. We also wished to develop amongst the working groups the values of cooperation, tolerance, support, and respect for differences, values which we aimed through this project to legitimate and transfer to our society. I believe we succeeded at the level of relationship building amongst more than eighty women from all communities who actively participated in carrying out the various phases of the project
The final educational and political aim was to make this process and its findings owned by many in our society something we did through community seminars and a conference at the university of Cyprus
Learning, connection, tension and frustration, as well as great richness and a wealth of surprises, marked the dynamics of this work. I believe working together has increased our power to be productive and to value our diverse talents and difficulties, avoiding both competition and exclusions, feelings we amply experience when working in a hierarchal setting. Below I discuss some of the themes as these emerged from the focus group discussions among women from all communities.
Women, the Self and Others
It is often very difficult in the Mediterranean culture to get women to talk about themselves, tell their own story and reflect on who they are, what they want and their achievements. This is because we tend to stress the community and communal identity more than the individual. The individual belongs to the group. This is also attributed to gender socialization which promotes the norm for women to ‘speak very little about ourselves’ and when we do we are judged as inappropriately egoistical and an indication of showing off. Another explanation related to socialization is that women are expected to listen more and speak less and focus on caring and serving the needs of the other or others (father, brothers, husbands, children, parents, community, the nation, etc.) rather than on their own needs and self development as autonomous beings. One of our subjects from the Latin Cypriot community expressed this as follows:
“To talk about myself is very difficult because it sounds as if you are either very humble or very arrogant to do so. In general, in Poland
Most of the women in the Latin group expressed the same hesitation to talk about themselves but with encouragement and after I pointed out the significance of personal story in the process of learning and producing knowledge they became more at ease. We met the same hesitation from the Maronite group, but the resistance was easier to handle. The Armenian and Greek Cypriot groups were more willing to talk about the self. The Turkish Cypriot women spoke about the self with reference to the Other and the social system, thus stressing the self in the community context. Here we note that both the individual agency and the social structure need to be considered.
“When I talk specifically about myself it was firstly me who felt uncomfortable as when I do something for the first time. Afterwards I questioned myself, why did I do that, why did I go there, did I have to do it?… when the communal structure changed after 1974 events I thought about my involvement in the trade union. In order to do this I had to leave my two-month old baby at home with someone else in order to attend the annual meeting and I felt bad about doing this but later I decided it was the right thing to do for me, but it was a struggle...” (TC woman)
This insight as expressed by some of the women into their own self awareness and struggle for self definition challenges the prevailing Cypriot culture and gender socialization. Most of the Greek Cypriot women, however, focused their individual pleasure on their children and the gratification they derive from being good mothers. Some of these women, however, regretted that they either focused on the needs of others or on too long working hours and thus neglected the self and when asked to talk about the Self they were not sure where to locate themselves. Does motherhood have a higher status than selfhood? How can both co-exist?
“When my children were small I stayed at home until noon and then left for the factory. But I never neglected taking my children to private lessons and both of them are university graduates. Everyday I had to drive them home, go to work, be with them to do their homework and watched that they did not waste time playing. I am proud of them. But my biggest regret is that I was working 18 hours a day and had no time left for myself. I had no time for my personal life, I always had to steal time as if I were a thief...” (G/C woman)
A Turkish Cypriot (TC) participant described a “bitter experience” when it was decided that she would begin her university studies. Relatives and neighbors came to her family’s home to wish goodbye and to convince the mother not to send her daughter abroad because she would regret it in her old age.
“ A woman neighbor came up to my mum and said, ‘you are making a mistake here. You should have kept her with you, you know she is the youngest kid and she has to stay with you to look after you, don’t send her away’… There is a sequence in what we should do as women,: we go to school, then get married, have kids, get them married and so on. If you don’t behave in what the community wants you to do, then the pressure starts”.
Another TC participant expressed her experience of social pressure as follows: “You cannot live on your own, there is a greater power over you, out there and you have to stay within the prescribed formula otherwise people will laugh at you”.
The self exists within the community. Even when women return to Cyprus after finishing their university studies abroad and decide to have a life of their own both the family and the community pressure starts demanding of them to comply with the traditional role of women, i.e., get married and have a family. Thus the self-autonomy they tried to develop while away from home collides with the lack of appreciation of other non-traditional achievements and abilities of women. As one of our TC participant said:
“When I came back to Cyprus
Another view expressed is that often women themselves undermine their own strengths and abilities which can lead to self-oppression. As one of the Greek Cypriot (GC) participants stated:
“We, as women, have a lot of power and talents but we do not really utilize them. This is so because we get tired of the daily chores and end up by saying ‘let the other do it’. There is, however, a contradiction here because we ourselves become demanding of others and our environment but not of ourselves. We live a contradiction, as if trapped.”
In a male-dominated world, women often adopt styles of behaviors and traits that will help them survive both as women and as “successful” professionals. For instance, one of the GC participants, a business woman, described herself as follows and responds in a way to the comment of the previous GC woman.
“I have learned to be in control otherwise I will not be able to survive. I have learned, thus, to dominate irrespective of who the others are ,whether men or women. I was once gentle, romantic, I was also very sensitive but not anymore. I have learned to be aggressive and to demand my rights.”
Others expressed a sense of guilt if they dare do something for themselves such as going to the hairdresser’s. This is how a Greek Cypriot young mother expressed it:
“Even when we go to the hairdresser’s we feel guilty because we left the children with our husbands, and we worry in case he is not able to take care of them, or if the children annoy him a lot. Many of us are so tortured by the remorse that we favour return to the old family values and wish that our daughters marry someone who will not allow them to work “
What we have observed, in general, is that women in Cyprus Cyprus
Discrimination and prejudices
A great deal has been written about issues of discrimination as it manifests in different ways; in the context of minorities, gender, ethnicity, class, sexuality, race and age. The dominant group usually tries to impose its norms and values on the Other. Prejudice is one of the most destructive aspects of human behaviours, often producing acts of violence both overt and covert. The classification of social groups into “us and them” whereby we attribute negative characteristics, attitudes and behaviors towards members of the outgroup create a culture of polarization and a tendency to homogenize communities (Hadjipavlou, 2003) . In our study women spoke both about gender and community discrimination as well as about prevailing prejudices.
Gender discrimination
In our focus group discussion the issue of gender discrimination was more evident and intense in the experiences of Greek and Turkish Cypriot women whereas other forms of discrimination such as at the workplace and the community levels were more intense in the Maronite and Armenia
In addition, women who experienced sexual harassment at the workplace said that the support system is weak. Women do not support other women. The power asymmetry is usually felt as a factor. Women are fearful to report such incidents because of either losing their jobs or not being taken seriously. Or once they do they are made to feel shame and guilt. One GC participant has been sexually harassed by her supervisor and because she did not give in, he made her life unbearable. After a while, she was forced to resign because he showed no respect. Similarly, a TC participant gave an example of such an experience.
“When I go to a customer (as a consultant) they don’t respect me because I am a woman. They dismiss me and ask for a male colleague to advise them on their business ventures. Will this change when we enter the European Union and, if so, how long would this take. When I go somewhere, I don’t want to be judged according to how I look or the way I dress, I demand equal respect.
Some of our participants experienced discrimination exercised by other women, which is both indicative of the lack of women’s solidarity and also a power issue. For instance, when women school inspectors had to evaluate the work of other women teachers in their effort to exercise and maintain their power and status they appear to be very strict, dominating, distant and unfair. Age also becomes an issue Younger more educated women in lower positions felt that their supervisor who had less knowledge than them used her power over them thus creating an unhealthy relationship, not conducive to learning and professional development. A GC young teacher complained:
“I expected my female supervisor to be different from the male supervisor I had last year. This is not the case. She terrified me with her demeaning comments and did not allow much of a dialogue. How women can become so insensitive once they acquire power, I wonder….”
Turkish Cypriot participants experienced control and domination by their mothers who would not allow their daughters to go out and date different men because the society does not approve of it but would feel comfortable if their sons dated many girls.
Community discrimination
Discrimination and prejudices are equally prevalent at the community level. Such behaviour is often expressed in terms of power relations, feelings of superiority and inferiority. Often the dominant group feels superior and does not really care to get to know and understand the minority cultures. The dominant group assumes that it knows what it is fair and best for the less powerful ones who in turn often internalize their lower status as if it were the natural state of affairs (Baker Miller, 1976).
Maronite Cypriot women, coming from a small community and having to struggle for their cultural and social survival encountered more discriminatory practices in their social interactions with the dominant group and also across each other community. In general, Maronite women perceive, for instance, both the living standard as well as the level of education of the Armenians and Greek Cypriots as being higher than their own. In addition, they perceive the Armenians having a historical advantage in that they share a common enemy with the Greek Cypriots, i.e .the Turks, and thus in their opinion this makes the Armenians feel closer to the dominant group. They also think that the others perceive them as ‘peasants with little education’ and speaking a strange language, which characterizes them as barbarians.
On the issue of historical advantage the Armenians argued that, because of the genocide against their nation by the Turks, they have suffered much more than the Maronites during the 1964 inter-communal violence and after the 1974 Turkish intervention. They invited the Maronite women to understand this pain. The impact of the Cyprus
“Many of us lost our homes and properties in the northern part of Nicosia Nicosia
The Maronite women also stressed the disastrous effects of the 1974 war on the cohesion of their community, their displacement from the four Maronite villages in the northern part of Cyprus- apart from a few hundreds who stayed at Kormakides village as ‘enclaved persons’. They repeatedly mentioned their concern about the shrinking of their community and the loss of their sense of cultural identity. In fact such concerns are felt by many minority groups.
Another traumatic experience of prejudice against the Maronites was vividly described by one the participants who felt rejected by a member of the dominant community, i.e. the Greek Cypriots the moment it became known that she was a Maronite by religion:
“When I was 18 I had an operation at the general hospital in NIcosia
Other Maronite women said that they may be working with their colleagues for years who do not know they are Maronites. But once the issue of one’s religion and identity come up in conversation, the Greek orthodox colleagues show their disappointment once they find out:“The stereotypical saying is ‘you don’t look it’. The word Maronite sounds as if we come from the outer space, something strange… or as if we carry a kind of a disease!.”
Due to discriminatory practices that many Maronite women have experienced they tend not to reveal their Maronite identity for as long as possible:
“Being different is perceived as being inferior or vulnerable to discrimination. For instance, children from mixed marriages do not reveal that the grandfather or grandmother is a Maronite. In addition, a lot of Maronites try to hide the fact that there are some differences between them and the Greek Cypriots or with the other communities. We adopt such behaviors as a self-protection mechanism. It is a means of protecting ourselves against the other. If you say you have differences, you simultaneously join the opposing camp”, some said.
At home, however, young mothers try to transfer to their children a sense of pride in being Maronites coming from Kormakitis village or from the other inaccessible villages in the northern part of Cyprus
Some Latin women also experienced communal discrimination. In particular, one has described her own experience in the workplace. She was considered a non-Greek speaker, although she had graduated from a Greek secondary school and was top in her class in both Greek and Latin. Despite her repeated applications for promotion she was forced in the end to resign so as not to receive another letter of “we regret to say that the committee…” . She believes both her gender and her religious background influenced the decision reached by the promotion committee.
Other Latin women also described their disappointment concerning delays in governmental procedures such as getting a Cypriot passport, despite the fact that they have been living on the island for many years, or even decades, and have had the right to vote.
Discriminatory practices against their community as a whole, have also been described by the Armenian participants. In particular, emphasis was given to the degree of ignorance the other communities exhibit towards the Armenian community. For instance, a participant gravely disappointed explained how the majority of Cypriots could not tell the difference between the Armenian and the Turkish languages “Something I do mind is when we talk with each other (in Armenian) and they (GCs) listen to us and ask whether the language we speak is Turkish, they do not understand, they don’t want to understand the difference. We have been here for so many decades and I believe they ought to have known by now to distinguish who we are and our language.”
In other words, discrimination arises out of ignorance, lack of social contacts (Allport, 1954) and the invisibility of the Armenians in the mainstream mass media. Both sides have a responsibility for such phenomena. The Armenians for not making the necessary effort to inform the other Cypriot communities about their history on the island, and the dominant group for not giving enough opportunities to all minorities to do so and feel included.
Similarly to the Maronites, Armenian women expressed their concern about the cultural survival of the community. In particular, the younger participants mentioned that their parents encourage them to get married to an Armenian man, thus loyalty to the community becomes a personal duty and renders itself to a different kind of oppression. from within: “Yes, my parents want me to get married to an Armenian. I have been hearing this since I was a little girl and I know inside me that I will marry an Armenian. I do not blame them because we are a small community.”
Furthermore, they stressed the fear that by going either to Greek or English schools in order to integrate in the bigger society, the changes that their language is undergoing may lead to their community’s extinction and thus will not be differentiated from the rest.
However, despite the discriminatory practices the Armenian women have expressed positive feelings as well. One participant said: “I have not experienced any discrimination at the workplace. I have worked in a lot of enterprises and I have observed that some managers prefer Armenian employees. They say that Armenians are more hard-working and more trustworthy than others”.
As far as the State contribution is concerned, the participants seemed very satisfied with governmental financial support to their community. More specifically, they talked about the State support concerning infrastructure; “We are proud that the Cyprus
Other Armenian participants have experienced no discrimination when it comes to engaging in civil society activities with Greek Cypriot women. “I experienced no discrimination from Greek Cypriot women who participate in the same associations and organizations as I do. There was no discrimination arising from the fact that I am of an Armenian origin. This is really nice!”
As it becomes apparent from the above, the smaller communities on the island, that is the Maronites, Armenians and Latins, have been experiencing both personal and community discrimination. Specifically, the main concern of the Maronite community, as this was expressed in the focus group interview, was the survival and cohesion of their community. The Armenians expressed their discontent at the unawareness and ignorance towards their history, values and practices of their community. In the words of one of the younger Armenian participants,
“I am considered somehow different, somehow strange because of my culture…But our experiences and our concerns are shared with the others. I believe there is no reason for discrimination to take place.”
Some Turkish Cypriot women expressed a stereotypical view about the Greek Cypriots in that they view them as, “very good business people. They are well organized, and work hard, but I think we are happier people. We are more cultured than them, and more creative. They are stuck with materialism and are under pressure to make money. Art is a rebellion and they have no such urge inside them. We are richer in that sense”.
Certainly, the lack of communication and contacts with the other, gives rise to prejudices, misperceptions and stereotypes, and makes such an environment difficult to be challenged. Another predominant theme that emerged from the focus group discussions concerned the issue of violence against women.
Violence within relationships
The second wave of feminism in the 1970s with the promotion of the position that the “personal is political” made public the discussion of issues of domestic violence, women’s rights for reproduction and women’s ownership of their bodies. The implication is that women’s private life is shaped by power asymmetries, domination of the male gender over the female and such issues are not rooted in the individual characteristics but rather in social structures and hierarchies of values. So individual problems often have systemic causes and many so-called personal decisions about issues of sexuality, appearance, consumption and family life have political implications (Jaggar, 2003).
The issue of violence against women has been put in the international agenda in the last decades relating it to human rights, “every woman has the right to be free from violence in both the public and the private sphere.” (Article 3 in the Convention on the Prevention, Punishment and Eradication of Violence against Women, 1994). The Beijing Platform for Action (1995) has included a whole section on “violence against women” which means any act of gender-based violence which results in, or is likely to result in physical, sexual, or psychological harm or suffering to women including threats of such acts, coercion or arbitrary deprivation of liberty, whether occurring in public or private life is deemed a crime.
Recently, the Greek Cypriot Parliament has passed a law making punishable any act of violence against women, including sexual harassment at the workplace and domestic violence, as well as psychological violence. Women need to be informed about these laws and become aware of their rights to stop abuse and mistreatment, which often has disastrous effects on their health. The last few years from studies done in Cyprus
Among our focus group discussion the issue of violence in the family context and inter-personal relationships was raised primarily by the Greek CYpriot participants. Women spoke very openly and sincerely about the abusive relationship with their husbands, feelings of humiliation, psychological abuse and lack of communication. Such dysfunctional relationships lead either to estrangement in the relationship and complete alienation, or to the woman leaving the house or apply for divorce. Sometimes because of social pressure they are forced to stay in a meaningless, abusive relationship.
When women invest a lot in the up-bringing and needs of their children, and the family as a whole, and after the children grow up and leave the house, then usually the mother would turn for support to her partner, so as to renew their relationship, to avoid loneliness and even depression. The husband’s response, according to these women, is usually indifference.
“When my children left, I thought I would go into depression. Who should I turn to, but my partner. I told my husband my problem and asked him to come home earlier at night so as to be together and renew our social life with our friends and tnurture our relationship. I was also going through my menopause and this made it even more difficult to deal with my emotions. He did not respond to my needs at all.”
Married Greek Cypriot women confess that they may have been married to the same man for many years but they do not feel that they know their partner, his feelings, thoughts or how he would behave in a given moment. The quality of the relationship is described as very poor and distant. One explanation that is given is that women desired to have a family so badly that, after the wedding, they start having children and all their energy and personal investment is channeled to the family. Another reason has to do with the husband’s domineering and oppressive attitude.
“I was not happy in my marriage; unfortunately my husband has always been very authoritative. He was a perfectionist and very demanding. He left the house temporarily and when he got sick he expected me to have him back and take care of him. And I did it because of social pressure but he give no appreciation..
Another GC participant admitted that she had problems with her relationship due to her being overworked with the children’s needs and neglected the relationship and was not able to put any boundaries. This resulted in miscommunication and she ended up leaving her home for a while:
“We need to look at our problems and find ways to solve them, otherwise they become a habit in our lives and we are taken for granted. I had a lot support from my family, my
friends and others but none from my husband.”
The women also noted that the separation of space between the domestic and the public leads to psychological abuse and exclusion. The wife still takes care of everything in the house but in the social context it is the husband’s opinion that carries all the weight.
Another serious issue many women face is their husband’s infidelity which became a rather serious social problem in Cyprus
In the Turkish Cypriot group, one of the issues that was raised with regard to domestic violence related to the father-daughter relationship. This is partly attributed to economic dependency and to the patriarchal role of the father. “Young women are still fearful of their father, it is a phenomenon that still goes on in our families. That’s the bitter truth. I think this is because of economic dependency… because of the bad economic situation father’s control is still going on unfortunately. There is a role that the family gives to a girl far from being independent.”
In the view of the Latin participants, women’s position in the family and their community has changed due to their economic independence. They also believe that in the case of dysfunctional marriages it is much easier for women today to get a divorce than it was years ago. In general, this is true according to statistics in the Greek Cypriot community where the rate of divorce has increased in recent years.
General Conclusions
In our discussion about what the European Union would mean for women, the Cypriot women viewed the EU accession process as a male and patriarchal project in which women were left outside. All the women demanded that more information on women’s issues and EU be disseminated, i.e. through the organization of seminars, public speeches and informal gatherings. All Cypriots must be properly informed about the benefits, opportunities, responsibilities and drawbacks resulting from entering the EU. Women want to feel part of the process and this can happen only if they are adequately informed both at home and in the public space. This sends a message to all the relevant authorities-government institutions, the political parties, the media and women’s organizations as well as NGOs. After all, the level of civil society development depends to a great deal on the level of public education and information disseminated to the people about their future and their own responsibilities and rights.
As mentioned earlier Cypriot women find themselves in a transitional context where modernity and traditionalism are intermixed in both the private and public realms of their lives. Some of these contradictions have been obvious with regard to personal choices.
The Greek and Turkish Cypriot women spoke very openly about the domestic violence which they attributed to power inequalities.. Some women spoke about the abusive relationships with their husbands, feelings of humiliation and lack of communication. In such dysfunctional relationships the women feel alienated, leave home, or opt for a divorce. Some however, spoke of staying in the relationship due to family and social pressures.
Many spoke about husbands’ infidelity and extra-marital affairs as a frequent personal and social problem. The Greek Cypriot women said that even when they confront their husbands with evidence of their infidelity, they not only deny it but they also confront them with “you are a fool, you are crazy and ready to be admitted to a psychiatric hospital” Such abuses lead women to doubt their own worth, state of mind and even try to induce guilt in them as if it were their fault This explains the increase in women’s health problems both physical and psychological,. Fathers’ power over their daughters were more talked about among the Turkish Cypriot women. They explained this social phenomenon as part of the economic dependency of young women.
Women often are underrepresented in public life and in the centers of decision-making (14% in the Parliament and 18% in the local government with no female member in the cabinet). And yet this study showed a worrisome fact: Cypriot women do not really feel the need to participate more actively in political, environmental, trade union, community and local government levels, where they could become visible and apply social pressure for changes they would wish to see. Thus the public space remains predominantly male.
Women’s political and historical awareness about the causes of the Cyprus conflict varies according to the experiences each community has had with regard to the different factors that contributed to the creation and perpetuation of the Cyprus
That lack of communication and contacts among the communities contributes, among other issues, to the perpetuation of the Cyprus
Throughout the group discussions the educational curriculum, the educational system and history textbooks were viewed as mechanisms that promote and reproduce the national narrative as defined by the dominant group, which is often based on the “enemy construction.” Without any serious reference to the existence of the smaller communities ion the island. The majority of women from the minority communities strongly stressed the absence of information about their history and culture from the official textbooks and how this absence generates prejudices, discriminations and exclusion.
Some General recommendations
One important conclusion from this study is the need for changes in public consciousness with regard to women’s issues .What has emerged clearly from the interpretations and analyses we have given about Cypriot women’s lives from all communities is the lack of public debate on such issues which we consider as important as the international efforts to solve the Cyprus conflict. When we speak about changes in public consciousness on gender issues we mean that the participation of the state, its institutions, the NGOs and the media need to be part of the process.
The Role of NGOS
Since the desire of all Cypriot women as this emerged from our study is to have opportunities to get to know each other, the role of NGOs is significant. They can undertake the organization of social gatherings, informal meetings, cultural events, seminars on issues that interest women of different ages, as well as promote success stories of women in the different communities. Another activity that NGOs can organize is an annual festival, in which women artists and creative minds will discuss and present their work. Such activities will help gradually eliminate many of the misperceptions and negative stereotypes that still prevail in the lives of many Cypriot women. Such activities can be funded by the government sector and international NGOs and supported by the Council of Europe or the universities. Seminars on women’s empowerment and training in gender awareness will familiarize men and women with the sex-stereotypes as limiting factors in the development of a civil society offering equal opportunities to all its citizens.
The Mass Media
The mass media, as a change agent in how women are portrayed or made visible in both the private and public life, is a mechanism that can be utilized positively to promote women’s empowerment and visibility in all aspects of life. For the promotion of women in public life, special training seminars can be organized by the NGOs in cooperation with government institutions and the media. Cypriot journalists and media persons need to be sensitized on the importance of gender issues in affecting change, the language they use -which is gendered - and to avoid women’s images which are degrading or sex specific It would help greatly to have new programs which will be run and managed by both men and women. We never see a woman on a Greek Cypriot TV program discussing defense issues for instance, and giving security a different understanding than the one which is given by men, i.e arms built-up and strategic defense. We believe women’s perspectives will broaden the debate and enrich the political agenda thus the whole society will benefit.
The State and its institutions
Formal education has been discussed as the main factor in creating misperceptions or complete invisibility of the other and the plea was for changes both in the curriculum and the content of textbooks, especially history, geography and literature. The methods of teaching, issues of democratization and promotion of values, such as tolerance, respect for difference and appreciation of one’s own and the other’s culture, that is learning to live with “otherness”. This is the role that the State can undertake in collaboration with conflict resolution experts and NGOs. New books on gender issues, multi-communal literature books, books on the EU in a simplified form should be in the hands of all students in the primary and secondary level of education. Courses on gender should be introduced from the kindergarten to the university. This requires training for male and female women teachers on both gender and multiculturalism.
The Establishment of a multi-communal NGO
We believe the creation of a large and inclusive Cypriot Women’s multi-communal NGO to address common issues and organize activities that would enrich the understanding and connections, as well as bring out the differences could be very relevant to the wider goal of multiculturalism in Cyprus
Finally, the need for continuous research on gender issues is of paramount importance to help us identify areas for change and connect these to the macro level and to the global agenda for gender equality and the construction of a better world for all.
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